AVATAR: The Movie Review

The Smurfs?

AVATAR
My biased movie review

It was an ingenious plan, the evil Gargamel created Smurfette to infiltrate the Smurfs, to learn their ways, so he could rid the world of these irritating creatures. His EVIL plan failed miserably, and Smufette soon becomes part of the Smurf tribe, and they all lived happily ever after. Smurfette, soon realizing that her story was meant for the silver screen, so she optioned off her idea to James Cameron, who spent $300 million dollars creating "Smurfs in 3D" and renaming Smurfette's original treatment AVATAR.

Yes, Avatar shares many similarities to the 1980's cartoon, from the plot, to the characters. There's even "Brainy Smurf" played by Sigourny Weaver. But don't get me wrong, I am not knocking Avatar for being Smurfs The Movie For Adults. Like the cartoon, the movie is great.

I actually think this movie is probably one of the best movies of the year. The 3D special effects are neat, but nothing really flies out at the screen too much. The reports of people getting sick at theaters are pretty much overblown. People get sick from playing video games. Honestly, I've seen better 3D effects in the Terminator ride at Universal Studios theme park. But this is pretty cool stuff to see.

If you're planning on watching this movie, and I'm sure you are, make sure you see it in IMAX 3D. Also, it's okay to sit pretty close to the screen. I sat 3 rows back on the incline portion of the movie theater; not the "Front-take-it-or leave it seats", those are too close. You can sit rather close on 3D movies because with 3D, you actually look INTO the screen, rather that at the screen. Sitting close actually allows the 3D environment to envelope you, and the effects are rather neat. My only complaint with 3D theaters are the cheap 2 cent glasses you have to wear. Not only are they uncomfortable, but they lower your IQ by 100 when you put it on.

The movie also runs close to 3 hours. So don't drink any soda before the movie. Make sure that bladder is dry. I swear, they are making movie so long these days, it would be in the movie theaters best interest to install white working porcelain toilets as seats.

On another note, I want to criticize movie critics out there. Not only do they have the easiest job in America, they also take their jobs way too seriously, and do it horribly. Most movie reviews tell you exactly what the movie is about. What the hell is up with that? Second, they rarely give you a solid opinion at the end of their article. Thirdly, for some reason, critics are always looking to learn some type of lesson from the silver screen. Wake up dumbo critics, movies are supposed to be fun. The real movie-goer audience watches movies to escape from reality. The real movie-goer audience learns their life lessons from life itself. If a movie is highly recommended by critics, almost automatically, you probably can assume that it's a long drawn out movie with too much dialogue, or a movie that glorifies a killer, or one that bashes conservative ideals.

For this movie, I think the critics gave the storyline a so-so, and the graphics a thumbs up. Well, the story-line is actually very fun and entertaining, and the graphics, well, are not that amazing. It's nothing we haven't seen before to be honest.

So my last words. See the movie before it gets kicked out of IMAX 3D.

Steve Young